So this is pretty much how I feel about my life right now.
Even though my arthritis is currently flaring up after being under control for 18 months.
Even though my shower decided to shed its tiles and I’m now looking at having to re-tile and furnish my bathroom on a virtually zero budget.
Even though my once never-have-to-question-its-security job isn’t so rock solid at this point in time.
Even though I’m facing the year ahead with a lot of uncertainty about what the future holds in every area of my life.
Even though I feel like I really have no idea what I’m doing with my life.
Somehow, this all doesn’t matter. And if you know me, you know that’s a big deal for me to say, because historically, I’m not very good at not letting all the ‘stuff’ of life overwhelm me.
But now? Now is time for all that to change.
This post I wrote after completing The Nester’s 31 Days writing challenge sums up how I’ve felt and lived much of my adult life, and I know I’m not alone. So many of my friends and other women I live life with feel the weight of not enough, of the expectation to do more, be more, to be everything everyone expects them to be.
I don’t know about you, but I’m so tired of this being the soundtrack of my life, and I’m not listening to it anymore.
No more listening to the voice in my head that says ‘You can’t/ it won’t work/ you always fail/ you’re never good enough’ and so on and so on.
No more expecting to fail.
No more believing that dreams are for other people.
No more being distracted by what I don’t have and think I need.
No more giving up because it’s too hard/uncomfortable/boring.
No more, so I can live more.
Jesus came so that I can life this life of mine as wholly and completely and full-to-bursting as I can. And I intend to grab it with both hands and shake out every last drop.
Every year at this time I go through the process of setting goals and think ‘this time it will be different’, but time and time again I get to December 31 and think ‘well that didn’t end well. Again’. This year, I’m taking a different tack.
Over the next few weeks, I’m going to take the time to be intentional about my intentions for the year ahead. Not resolutions, not simply setting goals, but really looking at the changes I want to make in my life and being intentional about implementing them.
This is new for me, and one thing I’ve learnt in 2013 is that having someone to journey with and be accountable to is really effective when it comes to staying on track. So I’m asking you, you dear, wonderful readers who spend some of your precious time reading these words of mine, to join me in this journey. I don’t know exactly how yet, or what this whole process will look like, but if I can encourage and cheer on anyone willing to walk with me, then it would be my pleasure to be able to do that.
I would love it if you’d drop into the comments and tell me what it is that would make 2014 different for you, things you want to change or achieve or how you would be encouraged along the way.
2014. It’s going to be awesome.